Author: runnergirl02

Breaks…

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So…Thanksgiving Break has begun! I guess technically it doesn’t really start until tomorrow because I would usually have to get up and get to school but tomorrow I don’t! I told my students I would miss them but I was also looking forward to a break! Breaks are a much needed slow down or can be if you are intentional. Sometimes I am, sometimes I’m not. I’m trying really hard during this break to be intentional, no checking work email, moving slower than usual and being ok if something doesn’t get done right when I think it should. I’m hopeful this will keep us in the present moment more spending time with the people in front of us, enjoying their company or helping where and when we can.

Today is Sunday and we usually meet together after church as a family with my brother and sister and their kids and my Mom. It’s nice to spend time together, visit with our nieces and nephews who are also our God-Children. I love my brother and sister and I love that, for the most part, I see them every Sunday, and sometimes more than once a week, depending on what’s happening that week.

The readings this week have been from the Book of Wisdom but today’s first reading was from Proverbs, 2nd reading was from the Letter of Paul to the Thessalonians and the Gospel was from Matthew, though during week it was from the Gospel of Luke.

So kind of strange…I was working out this morning with one of my favorite people, Michelle from Faithful Workouts, http://www.faithfulworkouts.com and she said something that made me think about the story in the Bible about the talents and how the Master gave the talents to his workers and then waited to see what they would do with them. Two of the guys get back double for the Master and one of them buries his talent because he was afraid. I was wondering if I’ve buried my talent out of fear, it was a passing thought while meditating during this workout.

Fast forward to Mass…the Gospel reading was about…the talents!! Hmm…I thought, I’m probably supposed to be hearing something from this. Father Carlos talked about not being afraid to use our talents/gifts/treasures. He reminded us that everything we have belongs to God and we just get to use it for awhile. He told us we should be wise about how we choose to use our talents. I’m still pondering exactly what Jesus wanted me to hear but I think it’s the being afraid part. I’m going to think and pray on it some more.

I bought a book about grief that a friend of ours wrote. We read the first few pages today and there was an exercise about breathing in prayer. I was thinking about it and adapted it later today to use with The Jesus Prayer, do you know The Jesus Prayer? Here’s a link to the book, in case your looking for something to help you during a season of grief: Breathing Through Grief …

Lord Jesus Christ, (breathe in)

Son of the Living God, (breathe out)

Have mercy on me, (breathe in)

a sinner. (breathe out)

I liked how that worked out. It is helpful to bring your focus back to the present moment. I appreciated the reminder.

For dinner tonight I made, Pesto Chicken Pizza, yum! I don’t get a lot of time to just kind of stand in the kitchen and cook during the week so I enjoyed putting our pizza together for our dinner tonight.

Time to get somethings done for Thanksgiving….

Today for promptings, for family, for prayers, for Chicken Pesto Pizza…

I Give Thanks!

I did run a little over 3 miles yesterday. I was aiming for 5 but I wasn’t feeling all that great, but our daughter guided us through the “middle mile” of the CIF State XC championship course…it’s very hilly…and I enjoy and appreciate that she still wants to spend time with her parents, she’s a sweet girl and God has blessed up greatly by allowing us to be a part of her life…she is a gift, everyday.

KOR

Here is the Chicken Pesto Pizza Before…I forgot the tomato, but it was still tasty!

Chicken Pesto Pizza after…Yummy! 🙂

October 23rd…

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Dates can be significant for good reasons, sad reasons and everything in between…

There’s a song by a favorite singer of ours called February 20th. It’s about the day the singers daughter asked Jesus to live in her heart. Three months later his little girl would be killed in a tragic accident caused by his own son. When I heard the news I left school early and went home to hug my little daughter who was 5 at the time. My daughter, like his, was adopted from China. The singer Steven Curtis Chapman had a small role in why we adopted from China and so I was so very sad for him and his family. It was a sad day, May 21st, 2008.

About a year later the artist released an album called, Beauty Will Rise. Early on I wondered if this loss would crush him and his family or if we’d even ever hear him sing again. The album answered that question. One of the songs is called Beauty will Rise, a lyric “out of these ashes Beauty will Rise.” The whole album spoke to me, helped me and it still does.

October 23rd, 2003, 20 years ago on this day, we lost our baby girl. Her name was Lauren Rose Penland. October is a hard month, so is September now, but October has always been an especially difficult month. Twenty years is a long time and at the same time not. The sadness is still there. The memories, terrible and vivid. It’s not a place to dwell for long, it’s a sad place, a dark place, a place void of hope or happiness, just dark. October 23rd, all the things I had planned were gone, just gone. No milestones, no graduations, holidays, no dancing with her Dad at her wedding, all gone, no hugs or kisses, an empty room, quiet, the door stayed closed for awhile.

I couldn’t sleep last night, some years are easier than others, this year not so easy. I see our daughter, her sister, celebrating all the milestones, navigating high school, sports, choir, driving, and I can’t help but wonder and wish that her sister was here to help her through these teenage years, or maybe they would be at odds, who knows? I’ll never know and that’s the hard part.

At first we took this day off but over the years it seemed harder to do, obligations, work usually or just wanting to stay busy, so today I went to school and taught and chatted with a couple of students who needed extra encouragement, called home to a few parents whose kids need to be talked to, went to a meeting that didn’t seem to have a point. I did all these things even though I really just wanted to stay home. I did them because I decided to ask God how he wanted to use me today, instead of living in my sadness and that is hard, living in my sadness is sometimes easier.

When I woke up this morning it was cloudy and gray. After school I ran around and did a few errands, nothing that really needed to be done, picked up my daughter, and headed to dinner with my Mom.

On our way home I remarked to my husband that the sun had come out, maybe I just noticed it and it had been out for awhile?

We saw a beautiful Sunset.

After dinner we helped a friend connect with another friend to pass along some treasured mementos that belonged to her Dad.

“This is not how is should be, this is not how it could be, but this is how it is, And Our God is in control…and we’ll sing Holy, Holy, Holy is our God..”

Today for beautiful Sunsets and songs that remind me…”Spring is Coming…” I Give Thanks!

No running today, back at it tomorrow…KOR

Birthdays

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This past Monday I turned 52!

Today my sweet husband had a party for me. It seems I frequently find myself celebrating my birthday on this date, October 22…

I have a cousin whose birthday is the day before mine so I try not to have my birthday celebration on his day, although there have been a few times I’ve messed that up…he’s forgiven me…at least I’m pretty sure he has 😉

I love to celebrate my birthday with my family and sometimes we’ll add a few friends, just depends on how much time we have to plan.

This year my birthday falls in the middle of a really contentious contract negotiation with my teachers union and so there is some underlying stress about whether or not we are going out on strike…so it was a small gathering of my cousins and my aunts 🙂 I almost canceled it at the last minute but I so wanted to see my new baby cousin, Baby Henry, such a cutie!

I love them all. They each have their unique personalities and I love talking with them and visiting. I love seeing my God-Children and I love that I still get to see my first cousins and now their kids 🙂

I love my family.

I love having my birthday as an excuse to see my family.

I don’t know if I will love 52. I mean so far it’s ok, as long as I resist the urge to try to predict the future and what might be coming my way…

Jesus said, “Do not be afraid.
You are worth more than many sparrows.” I try to remember this when I get frustrated about how much weight I’ve gained, how slow I run now or the little aches and pains I feel here and there. St. Paul said, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us”

So today…for birthdays…I Give Thanks!

We ran 4 miles yesterday out at the park, nice run, felt good, still rebuilding…two steps forward, one step back as they say…

KOR

My cake!

Eaton Trail, Woodward Park… from our run yesterday…..

Music

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I love music. I can’t say I love ALL music. I love most music.

I play guitar and I can play very simple piano. My daughter can play complicated piano.

I like to write songs. I’ve written a handful.

I enjoy listening to many different artist.

Tonight, for my birthday, I got to listen to my daughter’s school choir. Beautiful! I love listening to her school choir. The choir director is second to none. They are a beautiful choir and they sing beautiful songs praising God.

I love music.

So today for music…I Give Thanks!

KOR

A song I’ve been enjoying lately…

This is a song I wrote about my Dad…I miss him everyday but especially on days like today, when I know he would have been right there to watch our daughter sing…

Hiking

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Today I’m thankful for a beautiful hike with my favorite people.

I am tired but for a few hours I rested from thinking about all the sad things happening in the world right now.

God gives us respite when we need it and when I get to visit and inhabit places like this for a few hours I am amazed and I wonder and I thank God for knowing that His people would need places like this. Places that remind us, He’s still near and in the end it will all be alright.

For hiking with my loves, Point Lobos, and Asilomar beach…I give thanks!

Asilomar….had lunch here after our hike…

Point Lobos, South Shore trail…
Went to Mass here at St. Angelas to end the day 🙂

Guardian Angels and Baptisms!

On By runnergirl02In Biblical Reflections, Thankfulness, UncategorizedLeave a comment

Today is the feast day of our Guardian Angels. Angel means messenger.

If you grew up Catholic then chances are you learned this prayer growing up:

“Angel of God, My Guardian dear, To Whom God’s love entrust me here, Ever this day be at my side, To light, to guard, to rule and guide. Amen. “

Most Catholic kids learn this prayer by first grade. I went to a Catholic elementary school so I think I learned it in Kindergarten. The first prayer I ever learned was the Our Father and my Mom taught it to me. I remember I was kind of goofing around and she said in no uncertain terms that we do not goof around when we pray. I understood in that moment with my Mom all those years ago, prayer was important. I don’t think she actually knows that.

Angels are all throughout the bible. In Genesis 3:24, God placed an Angel with a flaming sword to guard the Garden of Eden and the Tree of Life. In Genesis 19, two Angels rescue Lot from Sodom. In Numbers 22:22-33 an Angel of the Lord blocks Balaam’s way. In the book of Judges the Angel of the Lord shows up and talks to Gideon and inspires him to battle to free Israel. In Daniel 6:22, “My God sent his angel and shut the lions mouth.” We meet Raphael in the book of Tobit, he helps Tobit’s son Tobiah on his quest to help his father. (If you aren’t Catholic you might not have this book in your bible, it got taken out after the reformation, it’s a good book, if you get a chance, you should definitely read it.) We meet Michael in Daniel, Jude and Revelation. We pray the St. Michaels prayer every Sunday before Mass.

“St. Michael, the Archangel, defend us in battle. Be our protection against wickedness and snares of the devil. May God rebuke him, we humbly pray; and do thou O prince of the heavenly host, by the power of God, cast out Satan and all evil spirits who prowl throughout the world seeking the ruin of souls. Amen.”

We meet Gabriel in Daniel and later in Luke, he speaks to Mary and Zechariah. An angel rolls back the stone at the resurrection. There were angels in the tomb who told Mary Magdalene that Jesus was gone. (John 20:12) When Jesus ascends into heaven two angels ask the apostles what they are looking at in the sky. Acts1:11. There are many more examples but I think you get the idea. In the Catechism of the Catholic Church sections 325-349 cover angels. This is from section 336 “From its beginning until death, human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession. Beside each believer stands an angel as protector and shepherd leading him to life. Already here on earth the Christian life shares by faith in the blessed company of angels and men united in God.” But don’t take my word or the word of the Catholic church, Jesus himself says there are angels and that he can summon them if he wants to, in Mathew 26:53. In Mathew 18:10 he says “see that you do not despise one of these little ones for I tell you that in heaven their angels always see the face of my Father who is in heaven.”

When I was 18 I was in a really bad roll over accident on the freeway. I hit a concrete barrier and flipped my car three times and it landed on its side. A truck driver from the opposite side of the freeway ran over and pulled me out of my wrecked car. I had one scratch. I should have died. Let me explain. Back in the 80’s there was no seat belt law and so when I learned to drive when I was 16, sometimes I wore my seatbelt and sometimes I didn’t. Sometimes to help my parents out I would take one of my siblings to school. The morning of the accident I took my little brother to school. We got in the car, a little Dodge Omni and I got ready to take off but before I put the car into gear I heard, “Debbie, put on your seatbelt.” It was odd but I listened and I put on my seatbelt. Twenty minutes later I was hanging by it on the side of the freeway. When the car first hit the barrier I thought a few things, first I thought, “Wow, so this is how it ends, so fast”, then I thought, “My Mom will be so sad,”, then I thought, ” I need to say the Our Father, if I make it to the part about forgiveness I’ll get to heaven,” then everything was black. I could feel glass and dirt hitting my face as I prayed and rolled. A lady pulled over and she was from my church and she hugged me and stayed with me and a man, I think a policemen, called my Mom at work and she came. If I didn’t put my seatbelt on I would have flown through the window of my car and I would have died or at least been severely injured. I was traveling at 65 miles an hour, just over the speed limit when it all happened. I went to work the next day and my co-worker found out that I was the one in the car she saw flipped over in the center divide of the freeway and she said, “I thought for sure whoever was in that car was dead.” I know God was with me for sure. I know the Holy Spirit told me to put on my seatbelt. I think my guardian angel covered me and held me in that car when I hit a cement barrier at 65 miles a hour, flipped three times and landed on the side, hanging from my seat belt. God sends his angels to guide and guard us. I was taught this from the time I was a little girl. I remember being afraid actually of sitting on mine somehow. Makes me laugh to think of that.

I’m sure many people have stories of angels. When my Dad died I could feel someone holding my hand during the Our Father and I thought it was my Dad, then I thought it was my Guardian Angel, later I decided it was Jesus, because he promised he was close to the broken-hearted. In the end, I don’t spend too much time wondering any more because whoever it is that holds my hand is either God or from God and I’m ok with that.

The beginning of our Creed goes like this, “I believe in God, the Father almighty, maker of heaven and earth, of all things visible and invisible…” it continues on from there, the point being there’s a whole invisible world we can’t see and that world includes angels and my Dad. When Father John came out from the hospital after giving my Dad his last rites, he told me that my Dad was part of the invisible not the absent. When Jason’s Dad died, Jason told me it gave him comfort to repeat the end of our Creed, “I look forward to the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come.” I wonder at the things we can’t see and I’m glad God has sent each one of us our own angel to watch over us.

Another great thing that happened today is that one of my students got baptized yesterday! He attends a church called Foundation 365 and I wanted to go support him, but it didn’t work out. This morning, however, he was so excited and he gave me a hug because he knows I’m a Christian and I got to congratulate him and give him a card I had written for him. I got to see pictures of his baptism and was just so excited for him. I promised to pray for him so if you are reading this please pray for him too! Our youth have so much against them. I watch my own beautiful daughter struggle with thoughts that are not from God. Thoughts that tell her she is unworthy, un-liked, unloved, even though there is ample evidence that this is not true. I tell her we have to train our minds to trust in and hope in God’s words and its not easy so I’m glad my student will be able to recall his baptism when life gets difficult and remember whose he is. I hope he will continue to learn about all the love God has for him. I can only answer questions about God when the kids ask me directly. I’m glad he asked if I was a Christian and I’m happy he shared his baptism with me.

For today for Guardian Angels and Baptisms…I Give Thanks!

We ran only 2miles today but we managed to keep with our 30/30 and 1/30 run/walk intervals so that was good…doing better everyday!

KOR

This is the neighbors cat…he likes to join us on our runs…he’s really a tripping hazard but so cute!

Teacher

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I am a teacher. When I complete this year I will have taught for 28 years, 26 of them at one high school.

I was looking up different profiles today and feeling kind of like I hadn’t done enough in life or with my life. Funny how that works. Comparison, the thief of contentment.

The gospel last Sunday was about the parable of the workers in the Vineyard, they all got paid the same wage at the end of the day and the workers who started work first felt cheated. Mathew 20:1-16

I feel cheated sometimes. I don’t have all the things I hoped to have.

I don’t have all the skills other people have. I don’t have all the money, prestige, acknowledgment some people have. I can feel sorry for myself sometimes and start to ask why? Why?

It seems to me we all have different jobs that Jesus wants us to accomplish and God will give us what we need to accomplish them regardless of whether or not we love Him. There are numerous examples of that in the Old Testament and the New Testament, the rain falls on the just and the unjust. Mathew 5:45

Sometimes the rain is good and needed and sometimes the rain creates havoc, crazy unpredictable storms or roads we have to drive down in order to get back home, but they can be slippery and dangerous and scary.

Lately, at least for me, the latter seems to be happening, although we seem to currently be in a calm patch.

Three years ago that wasn’t the case. Two week ago, September 19th, was my Dad’s anniversary of heading home. Three years and still like yesterday. All we were able to do was talk to him on video phone and then one night without any warning, we couldn’t talk to him any more. My Dad was beloved. My Dad loved God. My Dad loved his family and we tried so hard to be there with him but our government set in place restrictions that didn’t allow it. When my Dad was within minutes of death my mom, brother and pastor were allowed to be with him, so much rain, a downpour and since that day I have been wondering how someone like my Dad, a good man with a loving family ended up in a hospital alone, with no one to hold his hand or advocate for him, feed him ice chips, pray with him, comfort him. My family and I were cheated out of time with Dad during what would be his final days. 7 days, 2:00AM phone calls telling me things were going wrong, facetime chats with doctors and nurses. Reading his advanced health directive to my brother and sister at 2 in the morning, in the end it didn’t matter, the choice was made for us, an act of mercy.

The government imposed restrictions continued after his death, mourning him in a traditional manner with family in a church was against the rules. We sat in a church built for 900 people, but only 10 were allowed, with masks, and had my Dad’s funeral Mass. His oldest two grand-children were not allowed. The cemetery was a little more open since it was outside and we were told we could be there for 30 minutes. Later I helped my Mom pick out their gravestone, it was so hard, it was so very hard.

The parable about the vineyard speaks to me of the enormous mercy and love that God has for all his people. We can not comprehend the mind of God. 1Corinthians 2:11 We can’t understand his ways.

In the time that followed my Dad’s passing it gave me great comfort to attend daily Mass. We were still teaching and learning from home so every morning I got up, got dressed and went to Mass. There was no place else for me to go. I think I sort of understood what Peter meant. (John 6:68)

When we would say the Our Father most mornings, when we got to “Give us this day” it would feel like someone was holding my hand, my hand felt warm and heavy, like it does when someone is holding it, and I thought for awhile it was my Dad. I realized a year later it probably wasn’t my Dad. My guess is it was Jesus, always by my side, ever present and true. Funny how slow we are to see Jesus in our lives. When I sat quietly and thought about it I could see all the ways Jesus was there and I know my Dad wasn’t all alone even though our government said his family couldn’t be there. That brings me comfort, in a way. I know it was never it God’s plan for my Dad to die and I don’t blame God for any of it but oh how I wish somedays he was still here sitting in his chair in the morning when I would stop by, drinking coffee with my mom and sharing some news story with us or complaining about his water bill or taxes.

I guess this turned out to be mostly about my Dad and not teaching, it’s been awhile since I’ve written. I’ve kind of been hiding out I guess. Two years after my Dad died, our good friend Hector passed away, then my Dad’s sister, the family matriarch, we were with her as much as we could be, prayed with her and held her hand, tried to comfort her and gave her ice chips and then Great-Grandma, we were holding her hands and praying when she took her last breaths. They all passed within a month of each other and so close to the anniversary of my Dad’s passing, it was hard, so very hard.

I am glad, most days, that I decided to become a teacher. I get a chance every day to model God’s love for the kids, even if they don’t see it, understand it or know it. I get a chance to help them learn a science that I love, that I see God’s mind in, complicated and intricate.

In our letter today Paul told us to “complete my joy by being of the same mind, with the same love, united in heart, thinking one thing. Do nothing out of selfishness or out of vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also for those of others. Have in you the same attitude that is also in Christ Jesus.” Phil 2:1-5

I will try to do these things and when I find myself jealous of what others have or who others are or where others are able to go, I’ll remember all I ever need to aspire to be is like Jesus, as Father Brian said today, “nothing else matters.”

As for my friends and family who’ve moved on, “I look forward to the resurrection of the the dead, and the life of the world to come.”

For Jesus…I Give Thanks!

We did run this week, not very far but enjoyed some time up at the lake not far from our house. We are currently very slow, still rebuilding, I guess in more ways than one.

KOR

Braces…

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I haven’t written here in a long time and so many many things good, sad and bad have happened….

Today is a busy day. My daughter is getting her braces off! She is super excited. It’s been a long process exacerbated by this thing we call the Pandemic (bad thing, very bad) but today off they come.

After a little conversation about whether or not a small space between her bottom teeth matters, we determined it should be ok. I hope it will be. Actually, I’m a little concerned about whether or not we made the right choice. I wish Jason was here so he could share the blame if it was the wrong choice. Here’s where I would insert a crying laughing emoji if I knew how…

So here we are in May, 2021 and we seem to be at the tail end of a Pandemic that has upended everyone’s daily life. Those words aren’t even a good description of what this thing has done to most people. I don’t really want to write about the Pandemic. I don’t want to write about how we lost my Dad during it, how I cry and miss him everyday since he’s been gone, how I feel a huge responsibility for my Mom now and how I feel I’m failing most days. I don’t want to write about how the Pandemic messed up schools, made kids even more unsocial and more doubting of the wonderful people they were created to be. I don’t want to write about how it upended church, how with no science that made any sense my daughter was not allowed to attend her Grandpa’s funeral service because we could only have ten people in a church that normally fits 900, an arbitrary number set by the God-less state I live in. I started going to daily Mass when my dad first ended up in the hospital, it was outside, and I haven’t stopped since, it’s inside now. I would be an even bigger mess without Jesus. I don’t feel like writing about all the sleepless nights and restless days. I don’t want to write about the anxiety we had as we celebrated the holidays with a small subset of family because I needed things to feel a little bit normal as I mourned my beloved Daddy and missed him and wanted him to not be gone but to be here with us to celebrate so many good things. There were still good things and blessings happening during this Pandemic. We still celebrated with our family, Thanksgiving (outside), Christmas with testing and masks, and New Years all against the local health departments “orders”. If I had listened to the health department I would have missed a lot more than seven days with my dad. I would have missed his last Easter, birthday, Father’s Day, etc… If I had listened to our over-zealous divisive media I wouldn’t have seen my parents for months all for no good reason because none of us were sick. I don’t want to write about or argue about the governments over step and over reach into the lives of its citizens in the name of protecting us from that which is inevitable for every single soul. Last time I checked the mortality rate for a human was 100%. I don’t want to write about how we were kept from our Dad for the last seven days of his life because the hospital was worried we would either give him Covid or get Covid, that was until they needed a signature to make someone financially responsible for the autopsy bill, then they let me into the hospital and all the way up to the floor he was on to sign the paper but didn’t let me see him to say good-bye. I don’t want to write about how my Dad was so afraid of going to the hospital or to any doctor for that matter that I believe if they (the media) hadn’t terrified everyone he might have gone in to get care sooner. I don’t want to write about the fact that they tested my Dad three times for Covid, once after he had passed. They seemed to really want him to have it instead of the heart attack he died from while they were busy making sure he didn’t have Covid. I don’t want to write about how angry or sad I get when I think about how we lost my Dad.

Today I just want to write about my daughter because she is so happy to be getting her braces off. Such a simple normal thing to be happy about. I like that and I am grateful for that. My beautiful daughter is graduating from 8th grade in a couple of weeks. How did we get here? She is such a blessing. Even if I wasn’t her mom I would think she was a kind loving young lady with a good moral character and understanding of right and wrong. Does she like to clean her room? No, she’s not a saint…yet…and she’s pretty messy in general but in all the ways that matter, I see a soul always looking to God for guidance and trusting in His love for her and that makes me so very happy. I am praying daily that as she navigates these teen years she will continue to seek His face and know and understand her value and worth is found in Jesus. This little gal of ours continues to be a reminder to me of God’s endearing love for us and so for that I am also grateful…

So kind of a weird journal entry…it’s all I have for now as I really should be grading papers, well not papers but digital assignments and I’m trying to plan a fun taco party for my department, they were all so helpful and lovely when my Dad passed away I want to do something for them…I can hear my daughter in the other room…the braces are off, can’t wait to see her beautiful smile!!

So today for the removal of braces, God’s enduring love…and tacos!! I Give Thanks!!

KOR

Pray Persistently

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Today’s readings were about prayer.

Which is interesting because I’ve been doing a bible study and I’m stuck on the prayer chapter.

It’s not because I find it difficult to pray. It’s because I find it difficult to sit down and find time to study. There always seems to be something else to do or maybe I find things to do?

Hmmm, in all actuality I probably waste an hour or two a day on different things when I should be learning my music or studying.

I was talking to my husband about prayer last week and I was telling him all the different ways I try to pray during the day.

Usually, I don’t get out of bed without saying a prayer. On my drive to school I like to listen to Alistar Begg. He’s a Protestant preacher, who actually is probably pretty Anti–Catholic but I’m not real sure why as for all intents and purposes he sounds like a Catholic, who knows?

If I don’t listen to Alistar then I like to listen to a motivational speaker like Joel Osteen or Joyce Meyer. I know, I know, many people call them prosperity preachers and maybe they are but they are also very good at reminding people that God actually loves us and isn’t just sitting up there counting all our sins.

I think Catholics can forget this sometimes and get wrapped up in rules and roles and forget that the God of the universe died for us. Our sins are already forgiven, we are already saved, the price was paid 2000 years ago on a cross. There is no number of Hail Marys or Our Fathers that will change what already is, we are forgiven.

We can strive for perfection but we will never achieve it, it is impossible to achieve apart from God. We will never be in a state of perfect grace until we are home. People like Joel and Joyce remind me that God is loving and kind, that I am His daughter and that He looks at me lovingly.

My Catholic faith teaches me that I can and should ask for forgiveness often through the sacrament of reconciliation. God’s forgiveness is a freely offered gift. Joel and Joyce remind me that I shouldn’t be afraid to ask for forgiveness because our God is a loving, kind and compassionate God, who has already given it to us, though we don’t deserve it and can not earn it.

So, I was thinking I really should pray before I start class everyday but I’m usually in such a rush I don’t think to do it. We do pray most days before we leave our house and I do ask God to watch over the students at my school and our daughter’s school as well as the teachers. I do pray for my students that I know are having trouble. I care very much about them and their lives. We do pray also for our family and friends.

Anyway, today was an interesting sermon because it got me thinking about where else I could add prayer. Father James said to pray persistently. He talked about a Saint called Katharine Drexel. She was known as the woman who prayed all the time by the Native Americans she helped. She also helped fund and found Xavier University, a historically African American and Catholic University in Louisiana. Father James said St. Katherine prayed persistently.

I think our lives are supposed to be prayers. I think if you live your daily life with God foremost in your heart and mind each day of our life can be an offering of prayer. Talking to God, our Father throughout the day, chatting with Him while we drive or do chores, out loud or in our heart. Asking Him what we should do in our day. Asking Him to help us hear and see Him daily. For me, that’s what it means to pray persistently.

I have a ways to go but I am ever so thankful for God’s love and the ability to reach out to him at any time and ask for His help and guidance. He is always there ready to listen. You don’t have to go looking for Him. You don’t have to take a spiritual journey to India to find Him. You don’t have to be reincarnated until you’re perfect. You can’t find Him in the majesty of the mountains or the vastness of the sea. He dwells in you and me. He’s right here everyday, right next to us, near us, with us, in us, waiting to hear from us.

I read somewhere that with a lot of other religions you have to go looking for God. Christianity teaches the exact opposite. God comes looking for us. He wants every single one of His sheep with Him and He will go out and find you, call you, run to you. He is in the quiet. Prayer allows us to hear Him and build a relationship with Him. He waits for us in heaven, our ultimate home.

I hope to remember this every day of my life and I hope on days I don’t, I will hear Him call me back to Him.

Today for prayer…I Give Thanks!

KOR!

Here’s another favorite song of mine…Oh that I could have His Eyes

Give Me Your Eyes

It’s My Birthday! PSAT

On By runnergirl02In ThankfulnessLeave a comment

Ha!  I almost never go around saying “It’s My Birthday!”  Today I did and it was for a silly reason.

I had to work!  I had to give the PSAT at school and in the past I have had kids behave poorly.  This year the PSAT landed on my birthday and so I told the kids, “Hey guys, we have the PSAT on Wednesday, so please behave because it’s my birthday!”  They actually did pretty well but I still ended up with a migraine by the end of it all.

My sweet husband took half the day to take me to see a favorite movie, Downton Abby.  he brought me my  favorite pumpkin colored roses and lily’s! We had a taco lunch with other teachers from my department to celebrate my birthday and birthdays past.  It was a fast lunch but nice to see them.  A good friend who called me to wish me a “Happy Birthday” came and joined us, it was so nice to see her.  She helped a lot!  My co-worker, who is also an old student of mine made some really cool science themed birthday cards for everyone, so talented.

I had many phone calls today from my parents, my sister and brother, friends and my Australian daughter and another student who I think of as a son.

It was a lovely day.

Someday’s I can get sad and overwhelmed.  I think I am a bit on the anxious-worried side.  The world moves to fast or the news stores are too sad or some politician or this or that person is loud and vexatious to my spirit.  Sometimes it feels like everyone is too busy to be bothered or to bother with me.

I forget that God is always there for me.  Always waiting for me to share my day with Him and waiting for me to listen to Him.  Of course, I know He is there but sometimes I can’t find him.  Days when I wake up before the sun and am lying in bed worried about this or that and wondering where He is and why He hasn’t answered yet.  On days when I wake up and look ahead too far to the future worried about an end that isn’t certain wondering why I can’t rest peacefully in Him and trust in His love.

I heard Him loud and clear today.  You are loved.  You are valuable.  I love You.  Happy Birthday.  I heard Him through my friends and family, through my beautiful husband and daughter.  Today I was less sad and less anxious and worried because I felt Him close by in a tangible and loving way and I am so very thankful for this beautiful blessing.  He always seems to know when I need Him, when I need to hear from Him.  I am so grateful to Him today.

Of course, I think He’s always there and I’m just not always so great at noticing, but today I noticed and I hope to spend the rest of my life, whatever is left,  serving Him however I can because I love Him.  I look forward to the day when I will be with Him forever.  I bet it will be a lot like today.

Every day won’t be like today, the sadness will come back but today is a good day and I will rejoice in Him for it.

Today for my heavenly Father who gave me my very life and for the gift of all the wonderful people He placed into my life…I Give Thanks!

KOR!

Here’s a favorite song…I hope you enjoy it and I hope you know Him!

I Can Only Imagine