Hold the door open for someone…

Well, this one was easy as I almost always hold the door open for students when they come into class, so task accomplished.  My poor husband though, who I met for lunch, couldn’t seem to get anyone to walk through any door he tried to hold open!  Poor guy.

This topic got me thinking actually about how holding the door open for people is more than just the literal act of holding open a door.  We can all “hold the door open” for people in lots of different ways.  We can take a meal to someone.  We can spend time visiting someone who might be lonely.  We can give a young person some much needed encouragement or sound advice that they might not be able to get at home due to circumstances quite often out of their control.  We can do so many things to “hold the door open.”

Today’s reading was about Isaiah and his prophecy of Jesus.  The gospel was about Jesus telling the disciples basically, hey, I’m THE GUY, THE ONE, remember yesterday when I was wondering what exactly Andrew and Simon saw that made them leave immediately?  Today Jesus said this:

“Blessed are the eyes that see what you see.
For I say to you,
many prophets and kings desired to see what you see,
but did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, but did not hear it.”

I believe the bible is a living book.  It speaks to us wherever we are.  It’s God’s way of communicating with us, among others, every time I open it I learn something or hear something I never quite heard before.  God meets us in His word where we are. Today Jesus told me, it’s ME, I AM the one you are looking for, don’t be like the people who refuse to hear the good news, be like a little child.  To do that, Father says you have to be open minded, open to all the possibilities a relationship with Jesus brings.

The Advent reflection today introduced me to a cool website called, wearesaltandlight.org.  My husband and I met with a friend over the summer about trying to do something for the youth at our church to give them the opportunity to go out and practice their faith in a concrete way.  I am of the mind though that kids need models and so if they see their parents and other church members practicing their faith in concrete ways they will follow suit.  We talked about creating a database that contained the different gifts of parishioners so that we could match them up with people in our parish who are in need of concrete help in addition to prayer.  Nick Vujicic from Life Without Limbs, says we are God’s hands and feet.  If you don’t know who he is, google him, and then you will know why this is amazing.  We want our daughter to live her life with intention.  To have a purpose and a goal and so I think we need to model that for her so she knows what that looks like and how it is to live with intention under God’s direction.  Sometimes she’ll ask me what I think she should do when she grows up and I always ask her what she thinks God is asking her to be.  She thinks so far maybe a vet or a nun.  I want grandchildren so I’m hoping for vet, ha ha.  She has a love for animals and she has a love for people.  She has a very sweet heart.  I like that about her.  She is a good example for me.  It was good to come across this website because now it has made me want to spend some time over the break looking through it and really making a plan for this next year and living that plan intentionally.

I feel happiest when I am helping others.  I think most people do in general but I know for some people it feels more like a chore.  I just know that I really have enjoyed having our little troop work on service projects this year instead of some of the other “lessons” we are supposed to be doing.

The other cool reminder I got today, going back to something I mentioned yesterday about migrants and refugees, was that Jesus, Mary and Joseph were refugees.  They had to flee to Egypt to escape Herod.  I never thought of that before. The challenge question today was to think about Mary and Joseph, particularly Joseph and how he must have felt at having to leave his home, frankly for political reasons.  We see that with many many migrants and refugees.  I imagine Jesus is very close to them as He understands what it is to be a refugee.

I am constantly amazed at how God made one person who could understand so many many many different facets of human life.  Jesus was born but also adopted.  He was a refugee.  He was poor.  He worked. He had friends.  He was persecuted and mocked.  He was constantly questioned by the Pharisee, a way to check his intelligence, I suppose.  He suffered the loss of a good friend.  He despaired.  I think we’d be hard pressed to find any situation that we find ourselves in that Jesus didn’t also live through.  Amazing.  Our pastor says that the number one most important thing in our lives is to get to know Jesus, to call him friend.  Today I was listening to a podcast and the woman preacher asked if we were dating Jesus or married to Jesus, because you treat those two situations differently, one is total commitment, the other lukewarm.

Well, lots to think about today.  I didn’t even write about St. John Damascene, who had to flee his country because of religious persecution.  I’m really glad a friend suggested I try out the holidailies because its given me a goal to be intentional about.  Thank you friend!

Today for finding out about wearesaltandlight.org, for being reminded about all the ways Jesus knows me, for my husband holding my door open, for Advent, for good strong run this morning, for the roasted chicken I am making for dinner, and for the beautiful view of the snow on the mountains…I Give Thanks!

KOR

It’s hard to see kind of but here’s a picture of our snow capped mountains. A great sight here in my Ca Valley…

Buy a friend or a colleague a coffee..

Hmmm…well, this one was hard and I had to do a work around to accomplish it.  I sent a digital Starbucks gift card to a good friend, who recently has had some sad times.  I could not stop to get her a coffee or favorite drink because there isn’t a whole lot of time in the morning before I have to be at school and when I leave my home.  I have to make sure my little gal has lunch, my husband and I have our lunches and we have to drop her at my parents so they can take her to school before we head in for work.  So I consider what I did a cheat but at least she can pick out a favorite drink for herself or her son at a time that is best for her.

While we were reading the daily mass readings on our way in this AM, my husband and I came across Share the Journey, https://www.sharejourney.org/meet-your-neighbors/, here’s the link if you want to check it out.  Anyway, it’s about migrants, refugees, I guess this is a hot button issue for some people, sorry if that’s you.  It’s common sense to me, but maybe I’m not that common.  We have two big commandments we are supposed to follow, if you are a Christian, the first is to love God, basically meaning to surrender our life to him daily and the second is to love our neighbor as ourselves.  It’s kinda hard to accomplish the second of these commandments when we are building walls and other such non-sense.  I know, I know, the country needs to be secure and maybe walls have their place here and there, maybe it’s not even the wall I object to but the way migrants and refugees are characterized.  It’s disheartening.  So on that Share the Journey link you will find stories about refugees and how they ended up here in America.  They are worth reading through.

I can’t find anywhere in the bible where Jesus said to love our neighbors only if they look like us or act like us or vote like us.  I can’t find it anywhere in the bible that we should regard those with opinions different than ours as somehow less enlightened or less intelligent or bigots or hateful people.  I’ve looked and instead I’ve found stories about the Good Samaritan and the one we read today about the Centurion who asked Jesus for help.  Can you imagine?  A Roman soldier asking some guy, who could have been anyone really, to cure his servant.  What did he see in him?  Last Friday’s reading was about Andrew and Simon and how they dropped everything to follow Jesus.  Phew, everything.  What did they see in this guy?  I would have liked to have been there to feel it, because I can’t imagine what they felt was anything really different than how I felt when God called me, except, of course, they could see Him.  Boggles my mind.  Things like that and Paul, gosh, Paul, total transformation, willing to die for someone he never met in person.

The retreat question from this digital retreat:

https://www.crs.org/resource-center/holy-family-refugee-family-digital-advent-retreat

How are we willing to make room in our lives for the sufferings and joys of others, how do we do it and how could we do it better?

Upon examination of my own life I could definitely do better.  I think I’m good at being there for friends and family when something sad has happened.  I make a point to attend funerals for my friends when they have lost parents.  I make a point to attend funerals for good friends from church.  I could do better in the after math of loss.  I could stay in better contact and check-in more often.  Sadly, the speed at which life travels isn’t always conducive to this.  I could make the time, if I really stopped to think about it and plan my day with the right priorities.

Joys are easy I think, who isn’t happy for the announcement of a wedding, a baby, a job promotion, or some other little thing, kid gets into a certain college or someone buys a new house.  I guess maybe that’s harder to do if you let jealousy take over.  I wasn’t always genuinely happy for people when good things happened to them but it was because I saw their “success” through the lens of my “failure”.

Some joys are hard.  Baby showers are still hard for me, as an infertile woman, barring a miracle, past child bearing age.  I’m happy for the new parents.  I just don’t want to sit in a room full of women chattering about their birthing experiences.  Women who give birth sometimes have the habit of looking down on women who don’t.  I don’t think they mean it that way.  I once had to listen to a friend complain or maybe she wasn’t but go on and on and on about how she couldn’t breast feed her baby.  Another about how her birth plan didn’t go right, she had to have a cesarean.  Both times I wanted to bolt, one was over email and so I did bolt, just stopped reading.  It was painful to me and it felt like cruel and unnecessary information to share with a barren woman.  I know it wasn’t meant that way, and I know it was information shared because I was a friend but it didn’t stop me from wishing sometimes people would take into consideration my hurts and feelings in this particular area. Again, just my lens.  So I have an issue with joy in this department. I have planned several baby showers for my siblings, well three and with the exception of one, two of them were couples showers so my husband could be there with me.  I even sang at two of them.  We had a baby shower for our little gal but it was clearly an adoption shower and as there was no pregnant mom there for other ladies to give advice to I quite enjoyed it!

I’m not sure this particular pain is supposed to be healed because being able to connect with the deep sadness and at times despair of infertility allows me to connect with people in their grief.  Don’t get me wrong I have prayed for God to ease this pain but he hasn’t and so I must need it for something.  Paul says, His grace is sufficient.  It’s going to have to be for me too.

Bottom line is I can do better in both areas.  I’m glad for the question so I could think about how.

Well I have to go, the rest of my afternoon is super crazy, piano lessons, picking my husband up, dinner somewhere in there, homework, house stuff and start again tomorrow.  Monday’s are kind of hectic.

I am thankful today though for a chance to learn more about Share the Journey, super thankful for my work schedule, it’s mostly a half day schedule that allows me to pick my little gal up from school and be home in the afternoon, Trader Joe’s, I stopped there today to pick up some raw sunflower seeds for the granola I’m making tonight.  I will also be thankful today for joy and pain, because they are both powerful enough to bring people together….for all these things…I Give Thanks!

KOR

Here’s the digital card I sent to my friend. I liked the cute bear!

Walnut Crusted Pork Chops and Sweet Potatoes with Bacon! Yes Bacon!

Today I am thankful for many things.  My husband and I have been doing Whole 30 now for over 90 days.  We followed the first 30 days to the letter, the second 30 days, we had one treat for my birthday.  I made chocolate cupcakes with coconut flour and cashew butter frosting, really good but not compliant.  The last 90 days we’ve been reintroducing foods here and there.  We started with corn because we like tacos and moved on from there.  So far we’ve discovered, our bodies aren’t actually too crazy about bread, rice made us tired, beans…gassy and cheese was good but we don’t miss it.  We actually prefer eggs and zucchini now in the mornings instead of pancakes or waffles, they sound too heavy now, though I’m thinking on trying some pancakes made with oats next week.  The best thing is I’ve gone from Size XXL back to a Size L, lost several inches everywhere along with 25lbs! Yay!  We’ve decided to stay on this path because we feel so much better than we did before.  We have more energy.  We are enjoying lots of different types of food.  We eat mostly at home now and it gives me a chance to cook more, which I have always enjoyed doing.

Food is hard.  It’s attached with so many emotions and it can act as a drug when we are unhappy and want to feel better.  It can be a friend when we are lonely.  It can be a companion when we are happy.  Food is tough.  I just keep trying to remind myself that above all food should give my body the nutrients it needs to be strong, so I can be physically and mentally fit.  This is important because I think God has things for me to do and I can’t do those things when I feel like crap because I ate too much bread and sugar.

Since doing Whole 30 I notice I am definitely more calm.  I don’t lose my energy in the late afternoon like I used to.  I am able to stay awake longer in the evening and enjoy time with my family instead of vegging on the couch.

Today I had time to make a real meal!  I made Walnut Crusted Porkchops and Sweet Potatoes with Bacon :-)!

So today, for cooking, shirts that fit better, and so many many other things…I Give Thanks!

KOR

…and if you are a praying person…pray for the people in Northern California…there’s one thing that’s true about offering thoughts and prayers…thoughts are useless but prayer, prayer is powerful!

Here’s the dinner I made tonight. I really liked it, though the pork could have been a bit more moist, any hints, please feel free to advise!

Hot Cheetos!

Last Friday my daughter had a half day at school.  Her God-Father was chosen as the Grand Marshall of our local high school Homecoming Parade and invited her to ride in the Grand Marshall car with him.  She excitedly accepted.  After the parade I took her to her usual swim lesson and after the swim lesson we went to the Homecoming game to watch her God-Father get his plaque and do the coin toss.  Her God-Parents called her down to the field to be with them.  We got to sit in the special Grand Marshall seating and her God-Parents let her have her little friend sit with her in this section.  Her dad took her to the snack bar where she got a polish dog and a bag of Hot Cheetos.

At some point during the game I went to pick up the stuffed bear she brought with her and the Hot Cheetos slipped down behind the bleachers which are on a cement slant, alas the Hot Cheetos were gone.  My daughter was NOT happy.  The loss of the Hot Cheetos took over and that’s all she talked about until it was time to leave the game.  We attempted to replace the Hot Cheetos but the snack bar had run out.  This made her even more upset.  So from the time we left the stadium to the time we got home all I heard about were the lost Hot Cheetos.

You can imagine I was irritated because she had had a wonderful day, a parade, swimming, homecoming game with special seats, and still it wasn’t enough.  She still wanted the Hot Cheetos. I had a chat with her and reminded her about all the fun she had that day and I told her, “You get enough. Go to bed.”  She was still lamenting the Hot Cheetos.

Later on during our long run the next day, my husband and I were discussing what we should do about the apparent lack of appreciation our daughter was showing.  As we talked different topics came up.  Our conversations while running often ramble and range from when is the next fuel break to what is coming up in the following week, this one rambled along to talking about how we were led to our daughter through the gift of adoption.  The blessings we have in our lives.  All the gifts we have been given.  Our poor stewardship of those gifts.  At one point we were talking about something we wanted, I can’t remember what it was, a trip we wanted to take or some item maybe and all of a sudden my husband yelled, “Hot Cheetos!”

Holy Moly! Hot Cheetos!  I looked at him and I thought…we get enough but we still want more.  Hot Cheetos!  I began to wonder if we were modeling that behavior to our daughter.  I haven’t decided.  I don’t think so but I do know we could definitely be better stewards with the gifts God has given us.  Dave Ramsey says being content is necessary to being good stewards of our material gifts.  Deena Kastor in her book, Let Your Mind Run, talks about how she shaped her training and her life around thankfulness.  Our pastor says we should practice being thankful to God for his gifts of creation, family and friends everyday.

So every time I catch myself being greedy and wanting more I have a phrase that pops in my head now.  Hot Cheetos!  I immediately try to return to a place of gratitude and contentment with what my present situation is.  It doesn’t always work but its a start.  You’d think someone who has a blog about being thankful would actually be thankful.  Right?

For Hot Cheetos, Gods Gifts of Creation, talks during long runs with my husband that lead to realizations that I’m not really as grateful as I should be…I Give Thanks!

KOR!

Life Coach

So….I’ve been sick and tired and now I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired…so I told my husband I needed a Life Coach but I can’t really afford a Life Coach and so I went to google and googled…Can I be my own Life Coach?  The answer was Yes!

So I made a life wheel…You draw a circle with 8 spokes and you assign each spoke something that you think is important in your life… My wheel had health, spiritual, work, friends, family…I can’t remember the last three…I could look them up in my journal but right now my bedroom, where my journal is, seems so far away, anyway so next you assign a number to each spoke on a scale of 1-10 about each of these areas, after that you connect the dots.  If your life is balanced then you get a circle.   I didn’t get a circle.  I had two areas of my life wheel that were off kilter, causing my circle to look more like a lopsided oval with a spike.  The areas were health and friends.  So according to this google article next you are supposed to pick on area to focus on and quite often by just focusing on one area it will often help the other areas.  I picked health.  That was on Friday.  After you pick an area you are supposed to write down specific goals to improve this area.

Fast forward to Sunday morning and I still hadn’t written any goals but in the meantime I had talked my husband into being on my team.  I explained to him what a Life Coach was and told him about my wheel.  I told him I needed an accountability partner.  He laughed at me as only he can but in the end he agreed to help hold me accountable.  I woke up on Sunday morning knowing I needed to write some goals and I eventually came up with a list of specific goals for the week.

They were:

1)No Diet Soda or to continue not to drink diet soda.

2)Complete at least 2 cross training sessions.

3)Run at least 5 miles, which I thought was too low but my husband said gave me an easy target and an easy win for the week.

4)Eat at least 7 servings of fruits and vegetables, which I know is too low but gotta start someplace…

When I wrote or talked about writing down a goal that didn’t have to do with health my husband reminded me that I was supposed to focus on one thing, health.

So I’m three days into this new week and I can cross out 1 cross training workout, 2 miles run, and 6 fruits eaten and I have continued to stay away from diet soda.

What I noticed was having someone to be accountable to is nice.  It makes me want to actually keep to my goals.  I also noticed that since I had to write down my goals they are in my head and so far have helped keep me away from chocolate though not from having a Costco roll bread binge or a KFC fried chicken run…sigh…emotions got the better of me on both of those…

A teacher at a meeting told me he didn’t realize how much I ran and then said, “You never can tell by looking at someone.”  Thanks buddy….promptly sent me into a KFC tailspin…sigh…

Today some friends were talking about what they were going to wear to a local dinner dance for the school our kids attend and though they had told me earlier they were wearing dresses today they told me they were wearing slacks and a nice blouse…this threw me into a turmoil and thus the Costco roll bread binge…Really do you realize how hard it is to find a nice dress that isn’t too fancy and not too plain only to be told all your efforts were wasted because now the dress you planned to wear might be too nice compared to what others are wearing?  Ugh…What is casual anyway?

But you know what?  I’m thankful that I did write down those goals this week because even though I let my emotions get the better of me twice this week so far I am also able to feel proud that I am half way to accomplishing what I wanted to accomplish health wise for the week…

So today I leave with this thought….It is possible to be one’s own life coach…I mean do I really need to pay a lot of money to a stranger to have them tell me that I acted out on my negative emotions with my KFC chicken attack and my bread roll folly?  Not really…

I’m thankful for the husband God placed into my life, a husband that is willing to help me write goals and hold me accountable to them in a loving way.  I’m thankful for a God who loves music.  My husband shared a song with me this week that describes how I’ve been feeling lately and the defiance I hope to be able to show…It’s called Oh Fear…you should give it a listen….

So I’ve been a little lost lately…wandering around without a running goal and just kind of trying to get through the days…what a terrible way to live the one life we have to live…So I mean to do something about it and I’m starting or restarting with my health and I’ll see where it goes from there.  I encourage anyone reading this to try out the life wheel…silly as it sounds it’s given me a place to focus…here’s to no more KFC chicken attacks or Costco roll bread binges (though since I’ve actually eaten all the bread rolls or at least the outsides of them there is really no danger of this any longer)….

I aim to make a come back…

For running, life wheels, supportive husbands, and music…I Give Thanks!

Pharisee

…It took me many many many years to totally understand that in the story of the prodigal son…I was the prodigal.  I have spent most of my childhood and adult life agreeing with the older brother…and oh how I have seethed against Martha’s sister for sitting down and relaxing while Martha ran around making sure everyone was taken care of…so annoying….as you can see…therefore….I have absolutely no problem whatsoever seeing myself as the Pharisee…

I am soooo the Pharisee…alas and sigh.  My husband and I were talking about a story in Luke the other day, the woman who washed Jesus’s feet when he was invited to lunch with the Pharisee Simon.  Simon thought that if Jesus was really a prophet he would realize who this lady really was and after Jesus told her that her sins had been forgiven the other’s around the table, that would be me, started saying, “Who is this guy?”, maybe more like, “Who does this guy think he is?”

My husband pointed out something that I never really thought about.  Jesus is almost always talking to the prodigal, saying, “Come home son” or to the Pharisee, “Watch your step.”  It is a revelation to me this week that the prodigal has the easier time of it, I think, mostly because the Pharisee are too stupid to realize they are too stupid.  I am in serious trouble here.  While the prodigal just needs to ask forgiveness because they already know they are being ridiculous and that forgiveness is freely granted, the Pharisee, on the other hand, have to come to the realization that they aren’t as good as they think they are and that can take a really long time to happen, sometimes it may never happen.  Have you ever thought about whether or not you were a prodigal or a Pharisee?  If so which one do you think you are and why?  I’m trying to think of any good Pharisee in the bible and none are coming to mind…another concern for me today.  There are lots of prodigal and they are almost always redeemed, Pharisee, not so much…another long sigh…

…but since this is supposed to be a blog about being thankful I’ll pause and give thanks for a few things…

My daughter was on the sick side this weekend but thankful that it seems a mild illness and we were still able to have a little fun this morning before her fever returned.  Thankful for having a treadmill because I was able to do my 9 mile run anyway, since I could not leave my daughter with my mom while my husband and I do our long run.  Thankful for vanilla ice cream, sliced almonds and chocolate syrup:-)!!  Oh and sunflowers!  I got the most beautiful sunflowers at Whole Foods today:-)  They make me happy!

So for all these things…I Give Thanks!

KOR!

Garage Sales?

I think one of the really good things about garage sales is that they force me to go through my belongings and get rid of stuff.  When we have a garage sale we never keep anything that doesn’t sell.  We either leave it in a box on the curb to get taken for free or we donate it to Good Will.  We are not the kind of people who have a storage, if it doesn’t fit in my 1800 sq. ft. 4 bedroom house then we don’t need it…my husband on the other hand is a hoarder…so you know…conflict can arise…on occasion…

I don’t really have anyplace I’m going with this idea so I’ll just jot down a few things I’ve been thankful for this week…

-For my treadmill 🙂  Usually not a huge fan of treadmill running but the air here in the valley has been particularly bad because of the fires in our foothills.  I’ve been doing my runs this week on the treadmill.  I will brave the road tomorrow, hopefully the air is okay.  If you’ve watched the news and or read about the Willow Fire here in CA…we are about an hour or so away from that blaze…which leads me to…

-Firefighters…so thankful for those that brave these fires in ridiculous heat and work so hard to protect, people, livestock, buildings..

-For our garage sale today…helping us to get rid of some of the clutter in our lives…we still have a lot to be sure but you know being reminded you are blessed isn’t such a terrible thing…

-Almost forgot my daughter and I baked Zucchini Cupcakes with Cinnamon Cream Cheese Frosting this week! Yummy!

zucchini cupcakes

So for treadmills, firefighters, getting rid of clutter and cupcakes…I Give Thanks!

Keep on Running…